United States

Hi, I‘m Betty. I am Bisexual.

I am a married, bisexual woman, who has been out to her husband for about 10 years. I don't go around telling everyone and their dog that I'm bi, of course; however, my few close friends and family members do know this about me. I am also a recovering Mormon, who graduated from BYU. To aid my younger gay brother, who also was attending BYU earlier this year, I came out to my family as bisexual. Of course they weren't much surprised, since I've been the black sheep of the family for years!

What being bisexual means to me

It means being attracted to and loving people's souls, not their human bodies.

What I would like the world to know about bisexuals

Not all of us are swingers. Not all of us are into threesomes. We're not "confused" or "going through some phase" or "trying to go for the shock factor." Many of us are in loving relationships and even marriages.

What was your path to a bisexual identity?

When I was in college, after my first marriage ended horribly at the ripe old age of 20, I through I was gay. I thought that no man could ever understand or please me. My mom told me that I wasn't gay. She was right - as usual. What she didn't know then, and probably wished she didn't know now, is that I'm not gay or straight.

What is the toughest thing about being bisexual?

My husband has mixed feelings about my sexuality, and worries at times that I may leave him for a woman, since I've had sexual relationships with women. We're not swingers or in an "open" relationship per say, which makes it tough for me to know my boundaries at times.

What is the best thing about being bisexual?

Knowing that you have a deeper connection with people's hearts and not their parts. Also being able to help friends and family members who are gay - letting them know that their feelings are alright - that they're perfect and brave.

How have other people in your life reacted to your bisexuality?

Close friends think I'm a wonderful, loving and strong individual, who can help them with their own sexuality. Admittedly, my husband worries about me and doesn't really want to talk about it. My family (except my gay brother) worry and pray for my soul. They are all still loving and accepting of me being me though.

What advice do you have for someone who thinks they may be bi or who is in the process of coming out as bi?

If you think you don't know what your sexual preference is, or if you find yourself attracted to both men and women, chances are that you may be bi. There's a lot of negative feedback you may get from people if you tell them you may be bi. Don't listen to it. You're a loving individual who is above gender. You are beautiful and brave. Live and let love!