United States

Hi, I‘m Kara. I am Bisexual.

I was born in another country and moved to the United States when I was small. In my home country, sexuality isn't often discussed amongst the older generations (though that's definitely changing in the younger generations). I live in Florida in an area where the LGBTQ+ community is well respresented. There's an annual Pride Parade that I'd love to participate in sometime. I'm in high school in a program that honestly lacks diversity, but I do have friends who identify as lesbian and bisexual. I like playing guitar and making bracelets (as lame as that sounds, it's suprisingly fun). I'm in a service club at my school and we do lots of work to help our community. I recently received a camera from my grandmother and I've fallen in love with photography. It's a proper film camera and it's honestly really cool. I love science and history and math (when I understand it). I love to run and I participate in track at school. I love reading and walking on the beach at sundown.

What being bisexual means to me

Being bisexual means liking who you like, regardless of a person's gender. I identify as bisexual because it's a more widely used term, but I think pansexual better describes me. I believe more than two genders exist, and I sometimes feel bisexual is a limiting term. I'm attracted to all people, dependent only on their personality, not their gender or biological sex.

What I would like the world to know about bisexuals

Bisexuals exist. The erasure of bisexuals is a serious problem. I wish people could be supportive of bisexuals whether they are in a straight or gay relationship. I would like the world to know that oftentimes, bisexuals aren't equally attracted to certain genders. Bisexuals can be more attracted to a certain gender than another but that doesn't make their bisexuality any less real.

What was your path to a bisexual identity?

I think I knew I was bisexual from the time I was in middle school, but I didn't have a word to describe it and I didn't feel like I needed one. I dated a guy in middle school for a while but also experienced attraction to a girl and I ended up developing a crush on her. I never discussed my feelings with anyone because I never felt weird or odd. I didn't care. I think at first, I accepted my feelings head on. My parents are understanding and supportive of the LGBTQ+ community, but I still have not come out to them. I confirmed my bisexuality at the start if high school. One of my friends came out and I was so excited because I realized there were opportunities for me to find other people who liked more than just one gender. But then I started to doubt myself. Was I really bisexual or did my friend coming out make me WANT to be bisexual? I struggled between trying to discern whether I was straight or bisexual. I'm definitely bisexual. It's not a choice. I didn't go out looking to fall in love with a girl. I loved a guy (or as close as you can get to love as a teenager) and now I love a girl, and I'm still attracted to all genders. Bisexuality is sometimes really confusing and frustrating and can cause a lot of self doubt. I try to go back to those middle school days when I was confident and didn't care. I accepted myself. When I got excited my friend was bisexual, I realized I was happy to find someone like me. Also, I had been noticing girls for a while and that was another give away to me.

What is the toughest thing about being bisexual?

Finding other people who are bisexual in your own life, just to connect with someone.

What is the best thing about being bisexual?

Being able to love even more people.

How have other people in your life reacted to your bisexuality?

I told my cousin (who is also bisexual) in an email and that was that. There wasn't much discussion. I haven't told anyone else or discussed it with anyone else yet.

What advice do you have for someone who thinks they may be bi or who is in the process of coming out as bi?

If you're like me, and you don't really feel compelled to come out, there's no need to. Don't feel pressured. But I'd like to come out soon because coming out makes it so much easier to find people. If you think you might be bi, I personally think if you've come to this point, you probably are. And that's awesome. I hope that you feel comfortable and understand that this is totally normal and that you can come out in your own time.