United States

Hi, I‘m Jase. I am Bisexual.

I'm a writer and artist from Oklahoma City, Oklahoma. I was raised in rural Oklahoma, and spent many years in Dallas-Fort Worth before returning to my home state. While I've been in the mortgage industry as a compliance professional for over 8 years, my true passions are art - specifically painting, writing, and photography. I also love music, movies, cooking, travel, vintage/thrift stores, urban exploration, and reading. My favorite books to read are biographies of interesting and/or historical figures. I am captivated by paleoanthropology and ancient Egyptian studies. As a person living with mental illness, I'm also an advocate for ending the stigma surrounding mental illness.

What being bisexual means to me

Being bi is very simple to me. It means I find both men and women attractive. That's really all there is to it. Be they cis or trans, it doesn't matter (I don't know any agender people - that I'm aware - but that wouldn't matter either). My sexuality and desires are not fixed or constant. I may go through periods where my desire leans more towards men, or vice versa. Or I may be attracted to men and women simultaneously.

What I would like the world to know about bisexuals

Generally, most bisexual people aren't "50/50" bisexuals. Bi people aren't inherently unfaithful, nor are we somehow undecided on our "true" sexuality. No, I'm not going to leave my boyfriend for a woman just because I find women attractive, any more than I'd leave him for a man simply because of my attraction to other men.

What was your path to a bisexual identity?

I came out as gay almost immediately after graduating high school, and never questioned it further until many years later. During the course of a relationship with a trans* woman (who transitioned a couple of years into our relationship), I discovered my actual orientation as a bisexual man. I still found my girlfriend physically attractive as her body began to change from hormones, and I started to ask myself if I could see myself ever being in a relationship with another woman. The answer was yes. Initially, I was surprised. As stated before, I never really gave my identity as a gay man a second thought, until I did.

What is the toughest thing about being bisexual?

Having my sexuality constantly invalidated, particularly by friends who harbor no malicious intent. Biphobia and bisexual erasure are real and pervasive, even within the larger LGBT community. There's a reason we're often referred to as "the silent B."

What is the best thing about being bisexual?

Being able to increase bi visibility and educate people on what bisexuality is and is not.

How have other people in your life reacted to your bisexuality?

I've gotten a lot of support from friends, although I've certainly been asked a good deal of questions too! And I think it's great if someone wants to educate themselves on bisexual concerns and identity simply because they know me.

What advice do you have for someone who thinks they may be bi or who is in the process of coming out as bi?

Don't feel you need to rush it or conform to *anyone's* expectations of you and your sexuality. All will find its way in time.