Dear You: An Open Love Letter

Valentines-Day-Hearts-ClipartDear You,

Here we are again: February 14th – Valentine’s Day. This year, I thought I’d do something different. This year, I’d like to get to know You. I want to hear your views, your ideas, life as you’ve experienced it. This year I’d like us to wade, wallow, wake into some of the truths that surround us.

So let us forget for a moment the origin of this, the most greeting-card of holidays. Let us forget any negativity, any preconceptions, any burdens. Let’s just be in the moment. Let’s just breathe, be still, be our authentic selves.

Can I ask you some questions?

If you ever prefer to just be quiet, you’re welcome to say so. Proclaiming no can be such a loving action. I hope you feel comfortable sharing your boundaries with me. I’m glad for the opportunity to get to know you no matter how outloud you present.

valentines-day-vector-design2My pronouns are she/her/hers. What are yours? There are many sets of pronouns and I’m so happy you shared yours with me.

How do you feel about love? Is your love reserved for one person for a short time, many for a long time? Many for a short time, one for always?

One of the beautiful facets of this community is the many ways in which we love. Don’t you agree?

Do you feel that to have as a partner does not mean to take as a lover? Do you find yourself with many attractions or very defined?

Do aspects of unrealized objects of your love change as you move through time? Are those you love very much like you, or very different?

Romantic orientation is different than sexual orientation and attractions are as different as people. Our community has such a wondrous spectrum. I’m so glad your are a part of it.

valentines-heartHow is your support system? Are you able to share with them as you do with me? Do you feel safe letting others know you? Do you feel safe being you outside? Do you feel secure inside your home? Do you have one?

I hope you know that whether or not it is not safe or practical for you to stand up and be counted, you count.

How do you connect with others? Do you sometimes find yourself without the energy to reciprocate? Do you need time to get to know someone? Do you need touch? Do your potentialities for connections take a different form entirely?

It takes courage to give yourself the time, knowledge, and permission to connect in the ways that feel right to you. I hope you know pride in what you’ve accomplished.

Thank you for choosing to share some of your day with me. Wherever you are, I’m so glad you’re here. No matter your heart-made-of-heartspronouns, your identifiers, your proclivities, no matter how you see the world. No matter how the world sees you through the veil of its presumptions – I see you as you are. And you are beautiful. I respect your thoughts, your feelings, your every life experience. I hope to hear more about them.

First, let’s do something together.

Let’s forget about the origin of this. Let’s forget any negativity, any preconceptions, any burdens. Let’s just be in the moment. Let’s just breathe, be still, be our authentic selves. Let’s be quietly revolutionary and in that let us feel from every digit to every follicle the comforting blanket of knowledge that you are loved exactly as you are.

Because dear You, you are.

With love,
~SBS

valentines-day-hearts-6P.S. Join us to share your thoughts, your feelings, and your life experiences with love in the comments. One of the beautiful facets of this community is the many ways in which we love. Don’t you agree?

SB Swartz
SB Swartz is an author covering inclusive wellness, lgbt family, and reflections of our world as seen on tv. She’s a proud member of the #StillBisexual campaign, working to dispel the myth that bisexuals don't stay bisexual. Her home is filled with Battlestar Galactica posters, her husband, and their troublemaking cats. She adores them all.

Follow SB Swartz on Twitter @cosmostep and check out her workshop at sbswartz.tumblr.com.




  • Rio

    Thanks for this, Stephanie! As a polyamorous bisexual man, with a wife and a boyfriend, it means a lot to see all the amazing variety in the bi+ community celebrated in such a beautiful Valentine. <3