Questions & Answers

Is everyone bisexual?

In short, no.  Roughly 2.2% of women and 1.4% of men self-identify as bisexual.  The number of people whose behavior is bisexual, but who choose to label themselves as straight, gay, or lesbian, is certainly much higher – about 3 to 4 times that – but still represents less than 10% of the population.  Recent studies have shown that admission of bisexual attraction patterns is growing (largely due to increased acceptance), especially among millennials.  Depending upon the study and the country, as many as 2/3 of young people polled admitted to having at least a little attraction to people of more than one sex.

It’s not uncommon to hear people say things like “everyone is bisexual, deep down.”  While usually well-intended, it’s not a particularly helpful comment. First of all, it’s simply not true. Some people are bisexual, and some are not. Secondly, while sounding like a validation, these kinds of statements can actually contribute to bi erasure. Bi people are a significant proportion of the population, and it’s difficult to know just how large, but we aren’t 100% of the population. To pretend that we are would be to render the term meaningless and thus to erase the term altogether. Whatever percentage of the population is bi, it’s not 100%.


Answers


Like being straight and being gay, being bisexual is something that happens sometimes. I'm bisexual, but my husband is straight. If my husband were a woman, I would still be in love with her and want to have sex with her. But if the situation were reversed, and I had been born a man, my husband would no longer be interested in me. (One of many discussions we've had.) We would be friends if I were a man, but no matter how in love I was with him, he wouldn't date or marry me.

So he's really straight, and I'm really bisexual.

-Amaryn

No absolutely not. The fact that bisexuality is not enough taken into account or represented does not mean that everybody is bisexual. And of course it also does not mean in any manner that bisexuality is superior to homosexuality or heterosexuality. It just is.

-Pierre


Want to respond to this question? Sign up